Resolutions?

Posted by Ray | Posted on 2:28 AM

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Annually, without fail, a number of the human species engage in the peculiar and unique behavior of making mental notes of what it is they seek to achieve specifically in the upcoming year as the end of the present year looms. What is the motivation behind these 'resolutions'? Do they REALLY make us happy? Are they accurate yardsticks of how productive or fruitful the year is for us?

Let's just say, almost all of the resolutions I made for the past (2009) year would (perhaps did?) set me up for failure and disappointment. I realized that milestones and behavioral goals like quitting smoking* or earning a specific amount of cash* or grades* are very very shallow-level stuffs to accomplish in the span of one year of a person's life. Without trying to sound preachy, I believe that the real goals to attain should perhaps be more intrinsic and value-based. For example:

Sample resolution 2009 (and also 2008): Get to Grade X on guitar studies

Now, I did not sit for any examinations in the past year, in fact, never at all. And believe me, despite not obtaining this resolution of being 'approved' and certified, I was in fact very much satisfied with the past couple of years in terms of guitar-ing. How so? Because what I did throughout the course of the past two years, was to MEET people who are into music, both instrument specialists and enthused crooners, jam and learn from these people who are directly applying whatever they know into making originals or perfecting covers.

I'm not too sure about you, but the experience of meeting new found friends and being inspired by them is way more enriching than nervously trying to perform some exam piece for some so-called expert, no? In this case, I believe the actual goal should have been: To develop musically/gain better appreciation for music. Vague and general, yes, but much better than the narrow-minded 'I-must-be-this-level' crap. Way more fulfilling too. To me at least. Some people like printed papers.

Sample resolution 2009 no. 2: Deeper relationship with particular so-and-so

No one controls the weather. Nor another human being. Relationships wither and fade, fact. Don't attempt to achieve something that regardless of the amount of determination and effort you put in, could easily go wrong because you have no 'real' control over it. What the goal really should have been? To realize and appreciate the true relationships and significant characters in life, at least at this point in time. Vague and general too, yes, but the events of the past year has revealed to me people who will stand by regardless of how bad things are/may get, or however different we may be (e.g. nationality, race, gender, religion). At least when people fail you, you're still on the right track towards your goal (of finding true relationships).

2009 frankly was a shitty year, taking a lot out of me. But amidst the failure of most of my resolutions, I feel the year concludes on a high as I feel both happy and accomplished, now that I came to understand that it is much more fulfilling to learn about and be inspired by life than to merely cross off a checklist. Thanks to true friends for revealing who they really are, and to those who, with only one week, make the year seem much brighter.

Happy New Year

-Right Brain-

* not my goals, at least not all of them